❤️ Click here: 10 rules dating my daughter - dating in mayo
Here are 10 rules from a father to a teenage daughter's boyfriend: Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package because you're sure as heck not picking anything up. Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Do you want to pursue a relationship because you want to have fun in college or do you want to pursue a long-term relationship?
I think you should be questioning your own ability to think clearly. But the problem is that this internal struggle is all too familiar to a lot of the community, and it doesn't seem to be getting any easier, either.
- However, many of you have older daughters and you are in the middle of this tumultuous time of life.
Dads one of my favorite customers has five kids and was giving me parenting advice when is old enough to date—which will be in about 30 years. Dads, I am sure we ALL feel this way about our little girls. Rule Two: You do not touch my daughter. Not in front of me—ever until after you marry her, then not in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. You will no longer have hands. Rule Three: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you. Rule Five: It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only small talk I need from you is your perfect driving record and the additional added side and corner airbags. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you or you are proposing marriage. If you make her cry, I will make you cry. Rule Seven: As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating my daughter. She is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Rule Eight: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka — zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual themes are to be avoided; movies which feature chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better. My daughter has HeyWAY on her phone, I monitor her GPS location every five minutes. Rule Nine: Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and enough land behind the house. Do not trifle with me. I have a network of good attorneys. Your murder would only be my first offense—self defense. Rule Ten: Be afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit the car with both hands in plain sight, speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car — there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged gun-pointed-face at the window is mine. Quick copy of your license, please pee in this cup, and have a great time tonight! Dads what would you add to the list? Daughters what other rules do your dads put on your dates? Featured image of me and Caitlyn. Fred Campos, Top Geek, blogs about everything from to. In addition to blogging, he is a public speaker and humorist in child custody, social media, web development and parenting. He is married to one SuperParentMom, and raising three world changers. For more details on his custody course visit,. Make sure you to this blog. I laughed at the pee-in-the-cup comment. And Caitlyn is still a very young teen. I remembered feeling like I wanted to lock Amanda in a room and throw away the room at 13. And I remember what I was like at that age too, God help my family at that time. Sex happens in hormonal humans, and my goal here is for her to be healthy and happy, not slave to the norms of entirely obsolete dating rituals. Just my two cents, but Caitlyn will one day be a capable, grown woman, and hopefully going to college to get an education and not just to get her MRS. I do wish I had a shotgun sometimes, though. My Christian parenting values would normally let me focus on abstinence only. Actually this issue is the making of a great blog post. Glad you like the humor and I happy my daughter still finds humor in it as well. I do advice owning a shot gun, even if your purpose is just to clean it publicly every now and then. Good days are when the boyfriend is over.
There wass a hermit crab inside and it pinched her ear. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are servile idiots. Some of these visits may result in sleepovers, and some of these sleepovers may be in your bed. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your con. Most people are absolutely terrible at picking up hints. Now, by straight, I don't mean someone who isn't homosexual. Now that you two have tied the knot, there are a few things we should get straight. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Now because of her stupid parents he is out of her life. Old folks' homes are better. Quick copy of your license, please pee in this cup, and have a great time tonight!.
